When you live with invisible illness, you hear it all the time… “You’re too young to be so sick!” Well, how is sick supposed to look, and how old do I have to be before I can be sick?
The truth is, there’s no age limit on illness.
One of the biggest obstacles we face is getting people to take us seriously, which is truly insane. There is this misconception that if someone isn’t in a wheelchair, then they must not be all that ill. Or that the only real forms of diseases that exist are ones they’re familiar with. Conditions like cancer or… other forms of cancer.
Now, I am in no way saying cancer is not a horrible disease! I have had multiple family members pass away from different forms of cancer and friends that have been through it as well. I’m saying, there are MANY people who honestly think that if you’re sick, but it’s not cancer, then it’s no big deal. I have been told “well, at least it’s not cancer.” Very true, at least it’s not something treatable. It’s just something I’ve lived with my whole life, and will continue to live with forever. Sorry… getting back on track here.
How young is old enough? Would anyone go into a children’s hospital and go up to a child in a wheelchair then say “You are too young to be on so many medications! You just need to exercise, you’ll feel better soon”. No. Or if they did, everyone would throw a fit and kick them out. Because it’s a crappy thing to say to someone in pain, especially someone young who has a long road of frustration and recovery ahead of them. The only difference between them and us, is we have to constantly remind people we’re sick.
One day we may need to use a cane to walk, another we might do just fine without it. Then a flare hits and we’re lucky if we can get out of bed at all! People stare if we use the scooter at the grocery store, but the alternative is not getting food for our family and that is just not an option. Sometimes we don’t use the handicapped spot, even though we have the placard, just because we’re afraid of that note from condescending onlookers. Or if we do use the placard, we make sure everyone can tell just how much pain we’re in as we enter the store. Because, there’s a good chance that by the time we leave, we might not be able to walk on our own.
So, where does that leave us? In a no man’s land of tolerance? Desperately trying to gain approval from family, friends, doctors, specialists, teachers, co-workers, bosses, and anyone else who will listen. We just want to be heard! We want people to see us for who we are, not for what they think we should look like. It’s important to note that a few commercials on TV by prescription drug companies do not reflect the true nature of invisible illness! It’s excruciating pain, that does not go away with one daily pill… no matter what that pill is. There’s no miracle cure, no diet shake that works for everyone. Some people have had some pain reduction with things like this, but pain is not one size fits all and neither is treatment.
My point in all this is, please stop judging people based on age and outward appearance. You wouldn’t do it if they were in a wheelchair, don’t do it when they’re not. Period.